Our boys have been home for nearly four months now. It has been a time of great change, frustration, hardships, and joy...but we are all finally discovering our new normal. In many ways; it feels like the boys have just always been here and we were never without them.
Our days are busy. I still struggle with simple things...like making sure the laundry is done, school bags are packed, dishes are done, and sometimes simply remembering to shower. Bringing home children from a traumatic past is ALL consuming ALL the time. There is very little, if any, downtime. Its emotionally draining and most weeks I can't wait until grocery shopping day rolls around just so I can have an hour of alone time. I will get dressed, put on makeup, and do my hair JUST to go to the grocery store and feel normal. It sounds silly; but I would never wear makeup or dress up otherwise.
But I can assure you that it is ALL done in absolute joy. I wouldn't change a thing!
Many of you have asked what a day in our lives looks like...it is pretty much as follows...
I am awoken at 5:30AM by one or both of my daughters.
I then drag myself out of bed....
refill Pipers sippy cup...
change Piper into "big girl undies" so we can begin another day of potty training....
Come downstairs and instantly get a pot of coffee going...
Go down to the boys room...
Take Narkeez to the bathroom...
Wake Aidan up (he us usually still asleep)...
Change Aidan and dress him for the day....
Get Narkeez off the potty and dress him for the day...
Take both boys upstairs...
Fix breakfast for the kids (usually pop-tarts or cereal....oatmeal for Aidan)...
While they eat breakfast I am fetching school bags, filling lunch boxes, and finding the girls clothes to wear for the day....
Clean the kids up....
Dress the girls...
Fix the girls hair...
Put shoes on everyone...
Load the three school age kids in the truck (Narkeez, Aidan and Zoe)...
Asa leaves for work and drops the kids off at school.
I then give Piper a second breakfast because she wants to eat with Mommy...
Then I begin washing dishes, folding clothes, vacuuming, and making phone calls...this process is pretty much rinse and repeat until the kids get home from school at 2:30.
Asa drops the kids off and goes back to work for a few hours...
During this time I am in charge of homework, dinner, baths, and bed....
This whole process takes pretty much the entire two hours before Asa gets off work.
And we have to include Narkeez's therapy session somewhere in all of that...as well as Aidans therapy session (which includes a lot of one on one tasks)...
Then the whole process pretty much repeats itself the next day...
Our days are not nearly as busy as what they will be in the coming months...but they are a lot more subdued than they were the first few months home. We are just taking things a day at a time...one challenge at a time....
But over all everyone is doing wonderful!!! Aidan has a birthday coming up! He will be 7!!!
I am so unbelievably proud of him! He had his teeth fixed a few months after arriving home and that drastically improved his mood and over all well being. He is still small but has gone from 29 pounds to 32 pounds...we are quickly seeing the realization that he will always be small. He still has a lot of them same behaviors such as rocking, stimming, hitting, and shrieking....BUT those behaviors are significantly less. He loves to snuggle with Mama and has gained a lot of confidence; this boy isn't afraid of anything!!
Narkeez is doing wonderful too. He goes through bouts of stubbornness and during those moments he can be very difficult; but as a whole he is just a pure joy. He has been doing great at his therapy sessions and can now stand with minimal assistance. We are unsure if he will ever walk; but we have so much hope!!! He loves to joke and laugh. And he loves to cuddle with Mama whenever he gets the chance.
I will try to do better at keeping everyone updated....we are just so very blessed!!!
God of Wonders!!!!
Praise the Lord for your wonderful family. I know first hand the struggles that come with special needs children adopted from the Ukraine (we have 4) and the importance of having time for yourself. Aiden reminds me of our oldest daughters (twins) who are also blind and had a lot of institutional behaviors. After 2 years of love and extensive therapy my daughters are now attached to our family and thriving. I think you are doing a wonderful job! Know that we'll be praying for you all the way in The Netherlands!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for this update - I know how hard it is to find the time! Love how handsome Aidan looks in that picture with his hair all grown out (and here I always thought he was blond!).
ReplyDeleteYour family continues to be in my heart and prayers.
I think of your family often and hope you're all doing well. Will you be able to write a one year home update on the boys?
ReplyDeleteI found it interesting how your notes only focus on website..
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