Okay; so I have blogged about this before... but over the holidays we have come to realize that a vast majority of close family/friends are more worried/concerned about us adopting than they are happy and supportive.
Over the last week we have had a few questions thrown at us by friends and family...so, I thought I would answer them the best I can. PLEASE don't think for a moment that we are in any way upset or bothered by the questioning because they are ALL legitimate concerns that any loving family member or friend would have. We get it... and we would never let these questions hurt or anger us in any way.
" Are you crazy? Why would you adopt now? Why don't you wait till you are older and your children don't need so much?"
-Crazy; definitely not...just in love with an amazing little boy that God is calling us to add to our family. Why adopt now?...because, to us, waiting is selfish. Aiden can't wait. He can't wait for his Mommy and Daddy to bring him home; waiting five years (almost six) is long enough for him. The odds are not in his favor. With each passing year his chances of finding a family dwindle. HE is the child that God has called us to adopt; we have prayed unceasingly for Aiden and we know without an ounce of doubt that he is meant to be our son DESPITE his special needs. We also don't understand why our age is a concern at all; waiting till we are older won't make a bit of difference. Yes, we ARE young. But at the age of 25 and 26 we have been married for six years, have two gorgeous girls, are financially stable, and are well educated. We are by no means perfect...but in the end the only one we need to worry about pleasing is our God in heaven. We aren't worried; God has it under control.
"How are you going to deal with him!? Do you really think that the two of you can handle a child who can't see on top of the needs of your girls?"
- Theoretically; if I were pregnant with our third child, gave birth, and the baby was blind NO ONE would be questioning us. But because we are CHOOSING a child, who by society standards, is not perfectly healthy everyone thinks we are a little off our rocker. We will "deal" with him in the same manor we deal with our girls...we will love him without question, teach him right from wrong, punish him when he does wrong, praise him for his accomplishments, be patient and teach him about a God who loves him regardless! No doubt he will need special attention, therapy, and guidance but we are FULLY prepared to offer him that. There will be horribly difficult days and there will be wonderfully joyous days...but we will get through it. I am a stay at home mom...my mornings, days and nights are dedicated to being the VERY best mom and wife that I can be. I can devote my full attention to all three of my children. So for those who see us as ignorant or ill informed about the extent of his needs...please know we are not. We are researching, seeking guidance, taking classes, and teaching our daughters about how life with Aiden is going to change things.
"Does he even have his own room? Your house is far too small to accommodate a third child; especially a child with as many needs as Aiden."
- This requires no lengthy answer because it is simply is not true. Aiden will indeed have his own room, his own bathroom, his own closet, his own bed, and his own space in general. True; our house is small but we have enough bedrooms for all of our children (it's a 4 bedroom, 2 1/2 bath). Aidens room is downstairs where he is not going to be at risk of falling down stairs or not being able to find what he needs. We will, of course, have a video monitor set up for a while to ensure his safety.
" Why not adopt from the United States? There are so many children here who need loving homes."
- Our God has a heart for the "least of these"...there are indeed many wonderful children here in the United States waiting for a home, however, God calls us ALL to different places...to all corners of the world. For us, it is Eastern Europe and to Aiden. This is the journey that God has laid before US and we know many others who's calling is very different; but isn't that the way it's suppose to be? Adoption; no matter the corner of the globe, is a calling from our God in heaven and we trust in him fully to lead, guide, and direct us in the path that HE would have us take.