Wednesday, September 2, 2015

The Going is Slow...

I had forgotten ...well, more like "intentionally blocked" out how painfully slow, daunting, and overwhelming the first few months of a new adoption is. Lets face it...there is just a LOT!!

The same gnawing/paralyzing fears are bubbling back to the surface....and no...not a SINGLE one of them is necessary or justified. And yet they replay in my head like a broken record and I know that I will once again obsess over every step of this adoption. But, that doesn't have to be a bad thing.....

Let find the good.

Because there is SO much good.

Yes, it's hard....

Yup, I will whine and complain WAY too much throughout the process.....

But its all out of love. I only vent my momentary paperwork frustrations because I just want that end goal...I want our little girl in our, loved, and secure.....but mountains of paperwork stand in my way. It seems only natural I would despise the thing acting as barrier between us and our daughter. BUT I also know good and well that it is necessary. Every step step is insignificant...and in Gods timing....we will get to our girl.

We feel like this adoption has a bigger "unknown" factor than our last. With our boys, we were blessed enough to have missionaries giving us real time updates, sending pictures, and telling us how they were.....this time, we don't have any of that. We have a few short videos, 3 pictures, and a diagnosis list....a scary diagnosis list at that ( always thankful; I know many don't even have that).

She is diagnosed with....congenital malformations of her spinal cord/musculoskeletal system/eye/hip, lactose intolerance, nephritis, diverticulum of bladder, mental delays.....

We have researched everything on that list multiple times....and while we feel confident we can handle all of those needs....we still can't help but worry for our girl. We also know that she suffered from Leukemia as a baby. She is currently in remission (as far as we know) but we are also aware that it could relapse at any given which case her life would, quite literally, hang in the balance.

There are just so many unknowns.

But the one thing we do know is that we love her....just as a Mother loves her child before they are born....we love her before she is officially "ours". 

I have stared at her picture MANY times over the last few years. I remember thinking how precious she was and wondering how on earth no one had scooped her up yet....little did I know then that she was meant to be a part of our family....

I love those game changers that God throws at us sometimes....

Keeps us on our toes and reminds us who is really in charge of our lives....

I just ask for prayers....we have a long journey ahead and in many ways we dont have all the logistics planned out. We have no idea how we are going to make it work....but we know God will day at a time....


  1. Praying for you. Sounds like Losh shares some of those problems.


    Can man control the earth's climate, or is God in control of the weather? Do man-made carbon dioxide emission control the climate of the earth or does God control the weather? Who created the weather, man or God?

    Genesis 7:4 "For after seven more days I will cause it to rain on the earth forty days and forty nights, and I will destroy from the face of the earth all living things that I have made."(NKJV)

    Question: Did man-made CO2 emissions cause it to rain forty days and forty nights, and destroy everything but what was on the ark with Noah?

    Matthew 8:24-27......26 But He said to them, "Why are you fearful, O you of little faith? Then He arose and rebuked the winds and the sea. And there was great calm.........(NKJV)

    Questions: Did man-made CO2 emissions cause the storm. Did man calm the storm by controlling their carbon footprint?

    Job 37 1:24.... 6 For He says to the snow, 'Be on the earth': Likewise to the gentle rain and heavy rain of His strength......(NKJV)

    Question: Do men have the ability to control the climate by controlling man-made CO2 emissions?

    Psalm 135:6-7 Whatever the Lord pleases He does, In heaven and on earth, In the seas and in all deep places. 7 He causes the vapors to ascend from the ends of the earth; He makes lightning for the rain; He brings the wind out of His treasuries.(NKJV)

    Question: Can men control the climate by controlling man-made CO2 emissions?

    Who is in control of the climate, God in heaven or puny men on earth?

    [NOTE: Carbon dioxide is not a pollutant; neither is oxygen nor water. CO2, O, and H2O are necessary to sustain life.]

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